Terms of Use

By using this website, you agree to the following Terms of Use (or “Agreement”). Please read them carefully. You should. What if we included provisions giving us the right to harvest your soul?

Conditions of Use. By using this website, you agree and certify that you have read and reviewed this Agreement and have agreed to comply with its terms, even the dumb ones. A4PP Inc. only grants a license to use this website, its products, and its services to those who have accepted the terms of this Agreement. If you do not accept the terms of this Agreement, you must not use this website and you should probably give up using electronics in general.

Privacy. Before using the website, you are advised to review the Privacy Policy regarding user data collection. Its importance is only surpassed by its plodding
tediousness.

Age Restrictions. You must be 18 years of age to use this website. By using this website, you represent that you are at least 18 years of age, are legally able to enter into this Agreement, and that A4PP Inc. is not responsible for liabilities related to age misrepresentation. Do not lie about your age; that would be very immature.

Intellectual Property. You agree that all materials, products, or services displayed on this website, including all images, text, documents, logos, files, and other content, are the intellectual property of A4PP Inc. or its affiliates, officers, directors, agents, hitmen, suppliers, licensors, or other parties associated with A4PP Inc., and you agree not to reproduce, redistribute, reuse, reduce, or recycle any of this intellectual property in any way.

Warranty Disclaimers. You agree that your use of this website is at your own risk. A4PP Inc. does not guarantee that access or use of the website will be uninterrupted or error-free. This should be expected given its text was written by incompetent amateurs. You agree that this website is provided on an “as is” basis, with no warranties of any kind, express or implied, including but not limited to: warranties of title, hygiene, implied warranties of merchantability, fitness for particular purposes, fitness for sexual purposes, non-infringement, and warranties related to the adequacy, accuracy, or comprehensiveness of any information available through the website. A4PP Inc. and its associates shall in no event be held liable for any damages arising from your use or inability to use the website or any other matter relating to the website or other services.

Applicable Law. By using this website, you agree that the laws of North Carolina will govern this Agreement and any dispute arising between you and A4PP Inc. or its associates. This is despite the fact the NC government is inept and has many silly laws, such as using elephants to plow cotton fields is illegal. So is having sex in a hotel if you are unmarried.

ARBITRATION AGREEMENT. You agree that any disputes arising between you and A4PP Inc. shall be submitted to binding arbitration by a mutually agreed arbiter according to the procedures of the American Arbitration Association or American Arboretum Association.

Exclusive Remedy. If dissatisfied with the website, you agree that your sole remedy is to stop visiting or using the website. You are welcome to leave a negative review in our comments section…which we plan to never create.

Indemnification. You agree to indemnify A4PP Inc. and its associates and hold A4PP Inc. and its associates harmless against legal claims or demands arising from your misuse of our services. A4PP Inc. reserves the right to select legal representation for itself, its associates, and you as well. Just kidding, just for us and our affiliates.

Modification. A4PP Inc. reserves the right to modify these Terms of Use at any time, and you agree to be bound by any such modifications, even if they are colossally stupid. Modifications to this Agreement will be posted on the website.

Severability. If any provisions of this Agreement are found to be inconsistent or invalid under applicable law, those provisions shall be deemed void and removed from the Agreement, and all other provisions of this Agreement shall remain valid, in force, super cool, and unaffected by such removal.

Harvest of Soul(s). By using this website, you agree that A4PP Inc. may, but is not required to, harvest your soul(s), if any. Any such harvesting may only be completed by an in-person meeting of both parties at the Crossroads where A4PP Inc. will grant you supernatural guitar prowess in exchange for your mortal soul. This website does not in itself constitute a solicitation to harvest your soul(s), nor does your use of the website establish any actual or potential harvester-harvestee relationship.

Integration. These Terms of Use are an agreement between you and A4PP Inc., superseding and replacing any and all other prior agreements regarding the use of this website. Thank you for reading this entire document. You clearly have too much time on your hands.

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